Lose the cool – the non-judgmental Lindy Hopper

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So. You’re a Lindy Hopper.

Yay, that’s great!!! Lindy Hop is just about the best thing in the known universe… But let’s just get one thing cleared up once and for all and we’ll all be better for it.

You – we – all of us Lindy Hoppers – we are not cool.

The fact is that as Lindy Hoppers, we’re inherently NOT cool. We’re nerds! Wonderful weirdos, members of an unconventional cult, happy dance geeks. So chances are, if you feel cool you’re just probably not nearly as cool as you think you are – or as you’re trying to be – so let’s just get over it now and we’ll all enjoy ourselves so much more.

Let’s embrace what we actually are and lose the attempted cool once and for all!

I say all this to set up an important point about the social dance world that we’re all a part of.

Don’t Think, Just Ask!

We have all done it.  How can you help it? When we’re at a dance and looking for our next partner, we can’t help but pass judgement on the potential partners we see around us. This is completely based on the first visual impression, ie. appearances.

Age, athleticism, style of dress, height, facial expression, these all contribute to our feeling of whether or not this person is an eligible dance partner candidate.  We make that decision based on the initial instinct and either we’ll ask them to dance or our eyes will quickly move on and seek out a different partner.  This decision generally happens very fast. Our eyes move around the floor and will often dart away if we catch someone who doesn’t immediately fit the criteria.

For most of us this process is pretty much unconscious but whether we want to admit it or not the judgement is there. And just because it’s unconscious doesn’t make it okay.

Don’t judge a book by its cover! We’ve all heard it before, but how recently have you applied it? It does not matter what someone looks like. It doesn’t matter if they are “cool” or not. Like I’ve established, none of us are cool anyway, so let’s just drop it and indiscriminately start asking people to dance!

About a year ago, I made a conscious decision to change my behaviour at out-of-town dance events. Instead of giving any conscious thought to who I would ask to dance, I started asking the very first leader I laid eyes on. No more contemplation, no chance to size them up or estimate their level of dance experience based on their appearance. The first lead I lay eyes on I now immediately ask to dance. This has changed everything for me!

Since I adopted my “don’t think, just ask” approach to asking the very first leader I see to dance, the Lindy Hop floor has changed completely for me. Not only am I enjoying dances with lots of new people but I’m able to keep my momentum and rolling on the dance floor. Because I don’t have lulls without dancing due to “over thinking” and missing my chance to snag a partner, this method lends itself to continuous dancing without jarring starts and stops over the course of the night and I’ve been able to establish terrific dance drive over the course of an evening.

I also love how happily some people respond when they’re asked to dance. Since I’m asking some people who inevitably aren’t asked to dance very often, there’s a sincere pleasure when I ask them and I can’t help but reciprocate that warmth. Everyone should get to dance as much as possible, but that often isn’t the case. I really want to fix that.

When I’m in the “don’t think, just ask” mode and I start dancing with a random new partner, I really do invest myself fully in the dance no matter who I’m dancing with. I’ve always been someone who has enjoyed dancing with just about any leader, the only exception being if they are too tense and tight in their leading arm which eliminates my space. As long as my partner isn’t yanking me in on 1 or pushing me through turns, I can find some space and relaxation in the dance and I will surely have fun with leaders of all levels. (Unless of course I don’t like the music, but that’s another blog post.)

So I have to ask myself, why didn’t I adopt the “don’t think, just ask” method sooner!? I wish I had, but it hadn’t really occurred to me that I was discriminating on the dance floor, be it so very innocently. It’s not something that any of us want to admit to ourselves. Because I know that we’re all nice people. The judgment that our brains pass isn’t meant mean spiritedly, but we have to break the pattern. It probably hasn’t occurred to most people that it’s happening. It took me years before I really realized it. That’s why I wanted to write about my experience with it.

Snobbery

I remember attending the LA & Orange County Lindy Hop Exchange in or around 2002. It was the most snobby event I have ever attended. Nobody would make eye contact with anyone else unless they were already acquainted. Looking for a dance partner was a case of bowed heads and eyes quickly darting away so that strangers could avoid dancing with someone who might not be “good enough” for them.

Being pretty tenacious, I asked people to dance anyway. Because I was already a reasonably strong follower, once the dance began many of my partners would warm up to me when they felt that my level was up to snuff. It felt so shallow that I had to earn a smile or any general friendliness through my dance level. In contrast to most of the people there, I remember asking one well known California instructor to dance. He didn’t make eye contact with me or smile at all during the dance even after I followed everything that he led smoothly. In that case I remember thinking at the end of the dance that I almost preferred his way of shunning me the entire time because at least he was consistent. It seemed a lot more sincere than the leaders who warmed up to me once I had proved my ability.

Don’t be an elitist!

A few years ago at an annual workshop in a nearby city a guy in rotation said to me, “Mandi, you’re one of the good dancers but you’re not an elitist. Thank you for that.” That statement has really stuck with me. It’s true that a very cliquey attitude was developing among many of my peers at that time and I didn’t care for it. The other dancers of similar experience to my own were all hanging out together and I didn’t like the vibe. Instead of joining that circle, which I would probably have “fit in to” but it didn’t appeal to me, I spent a lot of time over the weekend with some of the less experienced dancers from my own city whose company I genuinely enjoyed. It’s interesting that my differing attitude was so clearly noticeable to that gentleman who made the comment.

Everyone loves Charlie

We have a wonderful dancer in Toronto by the name of Charlie. One of the many great things about Charlie is that he always asks beginners to dance. Why? His feeling is that you should always dance with the newbies because you never know if they might become good. Not only a *good* dancer, but perhaps even better than you! And if/when they do improve, you want them to remember that you were welcoming to them so that you can earn a place on their future dance roster.

Be part of the welcome wagon


My good friend Jaime reminded me of what a terrific ambassador of Lindy Hop a fellow named Patrick was to her when she joined our scene. When he learned that she was new to our city, he took her under his wing and introduced her to all of our regular dancers and really made her feel welcome. If it hadn’t been for that sincere and thorough welcome, who knows if she would have become so involved in our dance community and formed the friendships (and marriage) that have so profoundly shaped her life.

To me, Lindy Hop is all about inclusivity. I truly believe that anyone can and should dance, so much so that I’ve trademarked the statement and made it a part of my business. Cliquey is not cool, nor is socializing only with people with the same look or attitude as your own. That’s close minded and limited. The only people who are ever actually cool are the people who aren’t trying to be, so let’s drop the attempt and just dance.

The *real* cool

Cool to me has a completely different definition from what I started out to talk about. I think it’s “cool” when teens and retirees mingle in the same dance classes. I think it’s “cool” when people who  never participated in sports or other athletic activities in their youth find a way to express themselves physically through dancing. And I think it’s especially “cool” when people who have always struggled and felt awkward in social situations find that they can become a part of a community like ours and be made part of it instead of held apart on the outside.

So maybe as Lindy Hoppers, we are kind of cool after all. Just as long as we stay genuine and we don’t let it get to our heads.

Mandi Gould is Director & Head Dance Instructor for Bees’ Knees Dance in Toronto and St. Catharines, Ontario, Canada.

Song of the Week! February 10th – Black Coffee

Song: Black Coffee

Artist: The Careless Lovers

Continuing in last week’s vein, here’s another contemporary Lindy Hop music video and swinging song. The song is Black Coffee by the Careless Lovers and one of the musicians is himself a Lindy Hopper. This whole video really captures the great spirit of Seattle, Washington’s Lindy Hop scene.

Song of the Week! February 3rd – Baby Can Dance

Song: Baby Can Dance

Artist: Carsie Blanton

So catchy! I bet you can’t listen just once!

Not all of her music is as swinging, but you can check out more of it on her website. http://carsieblanton.bandcamp.com/

The music video features some recognizable Lindy Hoppers from the New Orleans area. Enjoy!

Mandi’s Bees’ Knees Birthday Party with live music! Thurs. March 1st

My birthday falls on a Thursday this year, so I’m bringing in a live band and inviting you to celebrate with me after classes on Thursday, March 1st. All welcome!

The party is free, but donations toward hiring the band would be much appreciated. $5 suggested donation would be helpful but not obligatory.

(Oh, and snacks to share too.)

  • Thursday, March 1, 2012
  • 9:30pm to ???
  • Free/optional suggested donation: $5

Thanks and all welcome!

~Mandi

Uncouth but important – Dance Bras!

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Hello Lady-Lindy Hoppers of the world!

I speak from experience. Me in the bustier days for those who didn't know me... maybe 2005?

I’d like to ask you an important question:

Does your bra pass the Charleston test?

I wasn’t sure if I should post this publicly or not. It’s a bit uncouth but I do feel that it’s an important topic.

In addition to being a Lindy Hopper, once upon a time I used to manage a lingerie store and breast health and care of our feminine form is an important topic for me. Let’s talk about DANCE BRAS.

A good dance bra makes a huge difference in how you carry yourself and your confidence on the dance floor. I used to be extremely busty (read: 34DDD/F) and I learned quickly that wearing the right dance bra could make or break my dancing experience. My personal size and situation have changed but picking the right dance bra is still something that I take very seriously.

I know that this is less of an issue for some women as for others, but no matter your size, I think it’s worth considering. I do NOT wear the same bra for every day life as I do for dancing.

When you’re not supported and you bounce a lot (too much), it actually causes the breast tissue to break down and we can start to get saggy… and then even bouncier. Not ideal! A good bra is great for protecting your breast health, and it will also make Charleston a lot easier and more pleasant.

My current favourite bra is the Lululemon Ta-ta tamer. It’s terrific. I use it both for dancing and the gym. I also enjoy that it comes in a variety of colours.

Next is the Shock Absorber. This is a phenomenal bra. For many of them, you have to be able to reaching behind your back to do them up which, for me, is the only draw back. You have to slip it over your head and then hook it behind and I have very inflexible arms and have a hard time with it, but if you’re not weirdly tight in your rotator cuffs like me this brand is AWESOME. Check out the really informative website. They do carry these at the Bay.

When I was larger, I used to rely on Lilyette bras as my go-to brand. They are fabulous full-support bras that are not specifically sport bras but they’re awesome and I found them to pass the Charleston-test.

Old videos from the bustier days:


There are other great bras out there too. It’s a matter of finding the right bra for you and that can take some time and effort. Also, don’t cheap-out! You might have to invest anywhere from $50 to $120 or more for a good bra, depending on your size. That might seem daunting and unfair, but you’re worth it! If you haven’t been properly fitted for a bra recently, this is also important and really worth having done.

Happy Charleston, and don’t hesitate to ask if you have any questions.

Mandi

Mandi Gould is Director & Head Dance Instructor for Bees’ Knees Dance in Toronto and St. Catharines, Ontario, Canada.

Rock n’ Roll Road Trip: 20th Annual CKOC Reunion Dance in Hamilton

Rock n' Roll dancing in Toronto

This was a lot of fun last year!

  • Saturday, February 25, 2012
  • 8:00pm until 1:00am
  • The Hamilton Careport Center, 270 Longwood Road South, Hamilton, ON

The folks at radio station OLDIES 1150 CKOC will be once again hosting their 20th annual Reunion Dance in February. This year’s nostalgic entertainment will be performed by the band SHAMA LAMA and the Retro Rockers. So come out and rip up the dance floor! Get into the spirit of the event by dressing in 1950’s-60’s styles as there are cash prizes to be won.

Tickets:
VIP Package: $30 each (includes finger foods, prime seating and special goodies)

General Seating: $20 each

GRAND PRIZE:
Two trips for 2 to the Ocean Blue Golf and Beach Resort, Punta Cana, Dominican Republic.

Other Prizes:
Trip for two to Cataloni a Playa Maruma, Mayan Riviera, Mexico

Bigger Venue
Free Parking
Lots of FUN and Prizes
Special Guests and Radio Personalities

http://www.oldies1150.com/Features/Story.aspx?ID=1565953

*CANCELLED* Family Day Workshop: Charleston for the Whole Family! Mon. Feb. 20

Unfortunately, there has not been enough pre-registration so this workshop has been cancelled.

Charleston for the Whole Family with Nancy Hitzig

Parents, kids, sisters and brothers – let’s get together this family day and practice your Charleston!
We’ll cover basics, classic variations and a routine. Emphasis will be placed on musicality, silliness and collaboration. All dance levels welcome. Attire: Comfy but you can jump and sweat.

  • Monday, February 20th
  • 3pm to 4:30pm
  • $15 per person, $10 for kids under 18
  • Location: 765B Yonge St., Toronto, ON (at Yonge & Bloor, above Starbucks)
  • Register Now! Listed under Special Workshops. Please list multiple family members in the comments section.

About Nancy

An award winning lindy hop dance instructor – dance, theatre and the opera are Nancy Hitzig’s passions. Having competed in places such as France, England, the United States and Canada, Nancy is known for her musicality and playfulness and for making every dance more fun than the last.

She currently works for the Institute for Canadian Citizenship as the Development Coordinator, and is actively involved in the Toronto arts community with Against the Grain Theatre holding two positions, General Manager and volunteer. Nancy has also worked with Opera Atelier as its Manager of Education & Marketing. She is also a classically trained vocalist and double bassist.

Workshop: Solo Sexy Movement – Sat. Mar. 3rd

Solo Sexy Movement with Nancy Hitzig

Wanna work it out like Cyd Charisse?

Get tips & tricks and learn choreographies that help you shake what your mama gave you in traditional jazz form. All dance levels welcome, flat shoes, gloves and heels recommended. Attire: Comfy but fitted.

  • Saturday, March 3rd
  • 11am to 12:30pm
  • $15/person
  • 765B Yonge St.
  • Register now!

About Nancy

An award winning lindy hop dance instructor – dance, theatre and the opera are Nancy Hitzig’s passions. Having competed in places such as France, England, the United States and Canada, Nancy is known for her musicality and playfulness and for making every dance more fun than the last.

She currently works for the Institute for Canadian Citizenship as the Development Coordinator, and is actively involved in the Toronto arts community with Against the Grain Theatre holding two positions, General Manager and volunteer. Nancy has also worked with Opera Atelier as its Manager of Education & Marketing. She is also a classically trained vocalist and double bassist.

Song of the Week! Fri. Jan. 20 – Shout Sister Shout

SONG OF THE WEEK

Song: Shout Sister Shout

Artist: Lucky Millinder with Sister Rosetta Sharpe

This is a great song because it’s very energetic without being fast. Enjoy!

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